Finding Strength: Jane’s Journey from Struggle to Self-Worth

When 30-year-old Jane first reached out to CCCWHC, she was drowning in the depths of severe post-natal depression. The birth of her now four-year-old daughter had brought immense love but also overwhelming darkness. She desperately wanted to feel better but couldn’t shake the relentless self-doubt that had followed her all her life.

In her first counselling session, Jane opened up about a lifelong battle with low self-esteem and a persistent sense of not belonging. She questioned what was wrong with her, why she never seemed to “fit” anywhere. She was also finding it difficult to hold down a job and was worried that if she lost her new job they would be in financial hardship. Jane said that when she was at school, she was always told that she was "lazy and needed to try harder" Despite years of therapy, she still felt like there was something wrong with her.

At the same time, Jane was navigating the stress of a new job, where she struggled to complete tasks, constantly feeling overwhelmed and confused. Every day felt like an uphill battle.

As a mother, she adored her daughter but felt inadequate—constantly second-guessing herself and giving in to her demands because she didn’t know how to handle her distress. She worried she was failing her, failing herself, and failing those around her.

Through counselling, Jane embarked on a journey of self-discovery and she began to see herself in a new light.

✨ Emotional Awareness – Jane learned how to name and express her emotions  in healthier ways, rather than suppressing them. For the first time, she allowed herself to feel without fear, finding safety in her own vulnerability.

✨ Discovering Clarity and Self-Worth – Anxiety often stems from uncertainty and a lack of direction. As Jane explored her core values, she rediscovered her love for painting and gardening—activities that aligned with her values of kindness and creativity. By embracing these passions, she found a renewed sense of purpose and confidence. No longer seeing herself as “broken,” she recognised being resilient and  creativity were strengths to be proud of.

✨ Owning Her Confidence as a parent – One of Jane’s biggest transformations was in setting boundaries with her daughter and her husband. Jane was fearful that if she said “no” to her daughter that she would have a meltdown and she wouldn't be able to handle it. She was also worried that she would appear to be unloving or too strict. Jane also felt like she didn’t know what to do when her daughter was having a meltdown. Jane was desperate to be the perfect mother & seen as having it all together.  Over time, Jane learnt that setting boundaries with her daughter, was teaching her about respect and responsibility. Jane started to feel more comfortable saying “no” to her daughter, knowing that even if he gets upset, she will be OK. Jane said “I now know I am a good enough mother.”

✨ A Life-Changing Diagnosis  A pivotal moment in Jane’s journey was the discovery that she had been living with undiagnosed ADHD. During a counselling session, her counsellor discussed the symptoms of ADHD in women. This conversation prompted Jane to seek further evaluation, leading her to book an assessment with a Mental Health GP and subsequently a Psychiatrist. For years, Jane had blamed herself for feeling scattered, overwhelmed, and different.

Receiving her ADHD diagnosis and starting medication has significantly improved her life. After starting stimulant medication and a contraceptive pill, Jane has experience significant improvements in areas that were previously challenging can now better concentrate on completing tasks both at home and work, feels calmer, and no longer experiences emotional turbulence. She can think more clearly about her responsibilities, which has enhanced her organization and reduced procrastination. Additionally, the Psychiatrist identified that Jane had been living with Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD), which causes extreme psychological and emotional distress in the two weeks leading up to her period.

In counselling, Jane was able to learn strategies for creating new habits, a routine and make lifestyle changes. She is also seeking more support from her husband and dedicating time to creative projects.

“Being diagnosed with ADHD has been life-changing. Starting medication was like putting glasses on I can now think more clearly and the fog inside my head has gone”. Jane also said counselling has had “a positively impact on my parenting and my relationship with my husband. Jane also said that she now knows that taking care of herself—physically, emotionally, and mentally—makes her a better parent, and that no matter what she is “good enough” and “I can now cope with anything that comes my way. I’ve got this!”